Meet Martin. His fingers are all thumbs and he stands just behind you, gently touching your back. You hear him breathe in and you wonder if he just sniffed your hair.

This is a character that comes easily to me, because he has always been there, lurking in the shadows. Join me for a work-in-progress exploration of what promises to eventually become a disturbing and repulsive full show.

For two nights only and possibly for the last time ever, Ram of God is coming again, to VAULT festival in the Vaults underneath Waterloo station! 11pm Friday and 10.30pm Saturday.

My Arts Council funded film made in lockdown is going to have a one-off live screening at Edinburgh’s most haunted pub (once featured on Don’t Tell the Bride) the Banshee Labyrinth, and will be on demand all festival with PBH’s free fringe, so it is Pay What You Want.

Ram of god is coming to Scotland for the Edinburgh fringe in Assembly’s Roxy Downstairs. LET THERE BE MILK

Ram is coming to Brighton fringe, this time in the illustrious Spiegeltent Bosco theatre! So, if you want to run away to the circus and join a cult, now’s your chance. For two nights only!

My application to the circus got accepted! I’ll be performing the Adventures of the Bearded Lady in the Brighton Spiegeltent as part of Brighton fringe. This is one of my dream venues to perform in so I can’t wait to come home to roost…

Ram will nourish you
Ram will punish you
Ram will come again!

Welcome to the church of Ram, where sheep are people, people are sheeple and the apocalypse is just getting started. Bow down, rest your head against the holy breast and suckle on the holy teat: only Ram can save you now. Part religious ceremony, part stadium rock concert, part cult AGM, this immersive sermon asks wild philosophical questions and provides long lasting and uniquely milk-based catharsis.

World premiere. Created with Soho Theatre’s Cabaret & Drag lab and supported by Arts Council England.

Work in progress premiere of my audio show about gender and crying, programmed as part of Camden People’s Theatre’s SPRINT DIGITAL season.

On demand til 6th June.

In the heart of the British countryside, prophet and visionary Ram of God leads his flock in a life of simple devotion. Followers are encouraged to live by the principles of Ram: joy in the everyday, the chasing of pleasure, release of pride and obedience. The apocalypse, scheduled in the year 2028, lurks in the distance.

With influences from seventies horror to cult documentaries, music videos and cereal adverts, 'Ram of God' is a playful takedown of masculinity and its shadowy cheerleaders that joyfully tackles the new possibilities and limitations of presenting theatre on screen.

“Deliciously daft” ★★★★ (The Guardian)
“Wickedly funny” ★★★★★ (A Younger Theatre)
“Joyously unhinged” ★★★★ (Reviews Hub)
“A commanding piece of art, I dare you to stomach it” ★★★★★ (Pocketsize Theatre)

Developed with Soho Theatre and supported by Arts Council England. Nominated for an OffFest award 2021.

One of the good things to come out of all the bad things this year is that it’s forced people to find new ways to create. Even though stage shows were cancelled, people have still been performing in strange and imaginative ways. I’m really happy to have been able to take part in international fringes like Wellington, it’s nothing like either the performer or the audience being there but for my part it’s given me a connection to another part of the world I wouldn’t have been able to go to physically (because time/money/energy). This fringe looks really cool.

Celebrate the end of the mini apocalypse with a glimpse at the future maxi one, scheduled in the year 2028. Informative and chilling: enjoy with a glass of milk and a freshly cracked egg.

Rated 4 stars in The Guardian and The Stage, Living Record Festival is a celebration of digital art and theatre, created as a response to lockdown. With its own virtual bar space and workshops run by Spun Glass Theatre, it’s managed to recreate the feeling of a fringe festival, something most of us are missing a lot right now! They also have a gifting feature whereby you can recommend shows you’ve liked to friends at a 25% discount, that continues the further it goes! Stream the shows anytime throughout.

And by ‘anytime’ I mean within the specified dates.

Born and raised in 'The Community', The Ladies (that’s me and Serena Flynn) are on their year-long walkabout and intend to take the music industry by storm (!) and collect the BIG cheque. They are now of marrying age, and as they say in the community: you can't pluck a lazy goose without loosening a few feathers. The Ladies are always looking to make new fans, and hope to see you there!

I TOLD YOU THE APOCALYPSE WAS COMING

Fresh from its international premiere at Stockholm fringe, Ram of God the film graces your screens for the blessed month of October. Developed with Soho Theatre's cabaret & drag lab and funding from Arts Council England, the raucous live show that never (yet) was is reimagined as a film. With influences from seventies horror to cereal adverts, Ram of God is a playful takedown of masculinity and its shadowy cheerleaders, and asks the question: to what extent patriarchy is a cult in which women are socialised to follow and men are socialised to lead.

Featuring original music by award winning composer Adam Jonota Bzowski and music transposed from a detail in Hieronymous Bosch's painting 'The Garden of Earthly Delights', printed on a man's naked backside in hell, the film playfully tackles the new possibilities and limitations of presenting theatre on screen.

Content warning: (15) references to drug & alcohol abuse, scenes of mental distress and suicide, graphic scenes of fantasy sex, nudity, mind control, sexual abuse and brainwashing. 

With all live shows of Ram of God cancelled this year, Stockholm fringe are screening shows online instead. This will be the first outing of Ram and I’m really excited to be working in a new way – instead of making a filmed theatre show, I’m making a film which I will then translate for the live stage shows next year in Brighton, London and Edinburgh. The show will be available to be streamed anytime during the festival, from 15th-19th Sept.

My application to the circus got accepted! I’ll be performing the Adventures of the Bearded Lady in the Spiegeltent Bosco Theatre as part of Brighton fringe. Can’t wait to come home to roost…

7.30pm-8.30pm, 5th & 6th May

RAM WILL NOURISH YOU

RAM WILL PUNISH YOU

RAM WILL COME AGAIN

Welcome to the church of Ram, where people are sheeple, sheep are people and the world is one short throw away from blowing up in a cloud of smoke. Come to The Temple, rest your head against the holy breast and suckle on the holy teat. Ram is your saviour, go in pieces. An immersive sermon for an absurdist world.

World premiere. Created and developed with Soho Theatre’s Cabaret & Drag lab.

Fri 1st, Sat 2nd, Sun 3rd & Thurs 7th & Fri 8th May

I am performing another show: The Adventures of the Bearded Lady at Brighton’s Speigeltent Bosco Theatre on the 5th & 6th May.

For 3 Fridays in a row, the bearded lady will be out on the town in London, in the very venue where it all began, many years ago. I was asked to write a monologue for an evening of monologues at The Gift Horse at the Horse & Stables pub on Westminster bridge road and came up with a bearded lady, tortured by the fact that her beard was stuck on with glue and she had been living a lie. Gradually the show developed into a full length piece that has journeyed all over the UK, as well as countries as varied as Scotland and Australia. Join me for VAULT festival on the 28th Feb, or the 6th or 13th March. We will revel aplenty!

It’s official! The bearded lady is going to Perth fringe!

Dream job, huge fanbase, and in a committed relationship with a hunky dancing bear. Everything was going right for the bearded lady, until her secret came out...

Appropriating Leonardos from da Vinci to DiCaprio, a gender bending journey and joyful f*ck you to a world that asks people to hide or change who they are.

~ 12-hour Celebration of Theatre, Live Art + Performance ~

We're giving Stour Space a full Aespia makeover with our signature sensory treats and even a bespoke theatre!

There will be three rooms, all embellished with Aespia delights, for your pleasure: The Glass Theatre, The Teeny Tiny Art School and The Snug.

Come shelter from the cold with us for back-to-back live performances; a dazzling carousel of theatre that’ll tickle your tear ducts and stir your loins.

Once your souls are warmed, we’ll dance into the wee hours to the sweet sounds of our Aespia resident DJs + special guests and, of course, more secret performances.

Dream job, huge fanbase and in a committed relationship with a hunky dancing bear. Everything was going right for the bearded lady; until her secret came out…

Appropriating Leonardos from da Vinci to DiCaprio, a gender-bending journey and joyful f*ck you to a world that asks people to hide or change who they are.

‘Van der Beek is a brilliantly understated comic writer and performer who draws on the work of Andy Warhol and Lady Gaga, as well as the punk spirit of Deborah Harry and the Sex Pistols‘ (Scotsman).